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Through it All I've Always Laughed: Memoirs of Count Arthur Strong

By Count Arthur Strong

Count number Arthur robust tells the tale of his striking trip from his humble early years because the in simple terms son of a contortionist in wartime Doncaster to the dizzy heights and excesses of popularity as one of many shining lighting fixtures of renowned entertainment.

Count Arthur robust is a express company legend, after-dinner speaker and a number one authority on old Egypt, having been stationed there in the course of his state provider. He has numerous acquaintances within the showbiz international. humans like Barry Cryer, the white haired one with glasses off 'I'm Sorry I Haven't acquired A Clue' and 'Jokers Wild'. this can be his first quantity, of what he believes could be a 6 quantity assortment, of his memoirs. He has a number of opt for dates nonetheless to be had for whatever (except window cleansing) and is represented, (if you could name it that) by way of Richard Daws at Komedia leisure. (Or so one can pass without delay via me and pay money, i will be able to do this as well.) (In truth I favor that.) thanks.

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I had an audition for a Stork margarine advertisement. What a idiot i used to be. What a foolish younger idiot. If purely i may flip the again of the clock again. There’s now not an afternoon passed by considering, while I haven’t rued that call. might be we’d were married now with youngsters? A boy and a woman. Charles and Dianna. or even I’d be infertile and we’d need to undertake. Or she should be artificially inseminated. i do know there’s now not a excessive good fortune cost. yet we might have attempted. we might have discovered a manner. Me and no matter what her identify was once. shall we have shared loads, however it used to be to not be. It used to be then and there i made a decision, like a catholic vicar, that love and marriage didn’t move jointly like a horse and carriage for me, and that i pledged that day to stay real to the only love of my existence, as visible in the course of the misted glass of a Tooting florists store window. at the plus part it’s a Balti condominium now's that florists, and so they do a really economical set meal for one. so that you understand, swings and roundabouts isn’t it? bankruptcy I research A LESSON It was once in 1980-something that I learnt one among my toughest classes in existence. Ever on account that I obtained began within the occupation I’d had an identical best London agent, Larry Trafalgar, of Larry Trafalgar affiliates. someday I realised that my ‘Dixon of Dock eco-friendly’ repeat funds hadn’t come via for a few, now not inconsiderable, time period. in all likelihood two decades. I’d telephoned phoned Larry a number of occasions approximately it, yet there has been no resolution. i attempted to inform myself that perhaps he used to be on vacation and that every little thing will be all right. yet I new someplace inside of, (of me), all used to be now not what it looked to be. i made a decision there has been not anything for it yet to name around to his places of work and notice what the deuce was once afoot. So I received the bus to wooden eco-friendly. The 147. whilst I disembarked of the bus, I nonetheless had just a little a stroll, which I didn’t brain. It was once a gorgeous sunny day and as I regarded up a bit fluffy cloud sailed throughout the azure blue of the wooden eco-friendly sky. As I became Larry’s highway a magpie flew throughout my line of imaginative and prescient and that i saluted it. no longer that I’m superstitious. I simply imagine that a few undesirable good fortune may well occur to me if I don’t do it. I must have stored myself the difficulty. Larry’s workplaces have been situated at quantity 22. I pressed his bell. a tender guy with a face on a head I’d by no means obvious prior to opened the door. “Yes? ”, he acknowledged. “How am i able to assist you? ” I stated, “Larry Trafalgar please”. He stated, “Sorry? ” “I acknowledged Larry Trafalgar. I frequently pass instantly through”. He stated, “Larry Trafalgar? You suggest the agent? ”. “Congratulations”, I uttered. “You understand who you're employed for”. He stated, “I don’t paintings for him. We’re metal Stockholders yet i do know who you suggest. We nonetheless ahead the ordinary letter to him”. good i used to be surprised. “What do you suggest, you continue to ahead the ordinary letter to him? ”, I implored. “Well we took over the place of work from him while he retired”. “What are you conversing approximately, ‘when he retired’? He’s my agent! He won’t have retired with no letting me comprehend. He’s bought all my ‘Dogsick of Dick Greene’ repeats money”. He stated, “He’s certainly retired. i do know that for a truth.

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